In today’s world, technology plays a big role in our lives. Some people think it is good for society, while others believe it causes more problems. I believe that technology has more positive effects than negative ones.
First of all, technology makes communication easier. People can now talk to their friends and family anytime using phones or the internet(, therefore developing a stronger relationship). For example, video calls help people stay in touch with loved ones who live far away.(Outcome) This is very helpful, especially during difficult times like the COVID-19 pandemic.
Also, technology has helped improve healthcare. Hospitals now use modern machines to find and treat diseases faster. People can also book doctor’s appointments online and even talk to doctors from home. This makes medical care faster and more convenient. (Concrete example)
However, technology also has some negative sides. Many people spend too much time on their phones or computers. This can make them feel lonely or stressed. Some people also become addicted to social media. But I think these problems can be solved by using technology in a healthy way.
In conclusion, even though technology can cause some problems, it brings many more benefits to our lives. It helps us stay connected, improves health services, and makes life more convenient. So, I believe technology has a mostly positive impact on society.

更改顏色:
紅色: 用字錯誤、冗言贅字
橘色: 文法錯誤
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1. 其實整體蠻清晰、不會讓人看不懂!
2. 但整體篇幅過少,請加上一些實際的例子(如藍色部分標注),篇幅就會很可觀了!