20260215_task 2_Discussion- peer pressure_Fifi

In contemporary society, a highly competitive environment is not confined to the job market, it is throughout the entire society. There is one “word” refers to the pressure on young people, which is “peer pressure”. One topic now under debate is the effect of peer pressure. Some people argue that peer pressure has positive effects on young people, while others do not agree with this point of view. (In this essay, I would elaborate on both perspectives and reasons behind)

I tend to agree that peer pressure has positive effects on young people(based on the motivation). Peer pressure allows students to draw on others’ strengths in terms of educational fields. Each student has their own talents. As a friend group among different individuals, they may pursue others’ strengths due to the eager that they want to be accepted by their friends. This, in turn, applies themselves to chasing for a variety of abilities which have positive effects on them. Moreover, these high quality individuals make the society more diverse and booming as they have diverse abilities.

However, each individual has different mental resilience levels, especially teenagers who often are described as fragile mental resilience. When it comes to overwhelming peer pressure on teenagers, it can lead to mental issues. What’s more, if people are concerned about the factor that they cannot change, they would be anxious, and the hurdle may linger in their minds. For instance, people who feel unsatisfactory for their looks would be unconfident to do things that need to face public.

From my perspective, appropriate peer pressure would motivate young people to grow and acquire more acknowledge. It not only allows individuals to be intellectual but also allows the society to grow in all aspects.

在〈20260215_task 2_Discussion- peer pressure_Fifi〉中有 3 則留言

  1. 看得出來這是第一次嘗試寫寫看雅思寫作!別灰心,請先不要管單字、文法,因為這都不是高分加分項,反而你要注意的是架構跟內容。

    我會分享我自己的寫作模板,你以後按照模板去寫,架構就會順很多了!

  2. 1. 這篇是Discussion essay,這種題型一定要有兩個body paragraph,分別說明positive and negative side。那 Agree/Disagree essay,這種題型也是要兩個body paragraph,但是講得是同個立場。舉例來說,我覺得peer pressure是好事,那就都要寫它的好,而不是突然換成不好的

    2. topic sentence(body paragraph的第一句話)是段落的門面,在這裡要清楚表達你選擇這個立場的原因,不要用過度的文法。第二段你寫道: “I tend to agree that peer pressure has positive effects on young people”讀到這個topic sentence,會讓讀者覺得這沒有重點,只是在講事實。要在後面補上原因(如紫色標注)

    3. 第二段最後一句,我覺得跟peer pressure毫無相關,這會是邏輯錯誤,影響整體寫作分數

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